Vulnerability is a Super Power
Words by Sarah Hartley, Editor in Chief
I have built a career on vulnerability. Not only my own vulnerability, but the incredible ability of other women to be vulnerable. Over the past 5 years, I have seen women pour their souls into a piece of writing in the hopes of sharing what they have been through and experienced in life.
The ability to be vulnerable with others is a uniquely difficult place to be. You are spilling some of your innermost thoughts and feelings with no idea how the person on the other side will react. The definition of vulnerability shows just how difficult this act can be: Vulnerability is “the quality or state of being exposed to the possibility of being attacked or harmed, either physically or emotionally.” That emotional attack is, I think, one of the scariest parts of writing in this way.
But in my experience, the act of vulnerability is one of the most powerful ways in which a writer can connect with an audience - whether in fiction or non-fiction. Allowing your reader to see inside of you can create a special bond from your words to their soul. It adds another layer to you and your life experiences. It allows the reader to step into your shoes and feel what you felt in that moment or moments.
Because of this power and bond, vulnerability felt like a great topic to address inside Illuminate, our writing community. We asked our Illuminate members to write about vulnerability this month, and below you’ll find a roundup of their take on this subject. We hope you’ll visit each post and maybe even meet your new favorite writer.
Being Vulnerable With My Body by Hannah Kewley
For many, being vulnerable with their body means styling it in novel ways or exposing it to others. Taking a chance on new fashions, or feeling vulnerable with our flesh under the gaze of others.
But to me, being vulnerable with my body means the slow unravelling of conditioning, of the voices of others that have permeated my skin, which I now choose to wash out. It’s stepping into an unexplored frontier, with few guides and many voices of doubt. A frontier that forges a different perspective and relationship to our bodies from a hard fight against the status quo.
Quitting Cold Turkey by Mia Sutton
I feel very vulnerable to admit that as a proponent for anxiety medication (if it’s right for you!), I haven’t found the right solution yet. I feel very vulnerable to admit that as a writer, a writing mentor, a lover of words, that I haven’t found the right solution yet. After 7 years, I still don’t have it all figured out. That’s hard to accept.
But I decided that I've had enough of silencing my words and I stopped taking my medication a few weeks ago. I don't really recommend doing it cold turkey, by the way.
I Have Been Sick All My Life by Jennifer Brown
I am immunocompromised: Please Consider Me
This has been a really difficult and scary year for me.
And for so many of my friends and fellow disabled community members.
We have heard over and over that our lives don’t matter.
And now that there is a vaccine - the world wants to leave us behind.
We may be slightly more protected once vaccinated
However, we cannot let our collective guards down
I cannot suddenly say ‘yes’ to all these magic gatherings that people are planning
Not until there’s herd immunity
And even then, kidney disease does not have good Covid outcomes
And I am so angry
I feel scared
To the Women Working in Male-Dominated Fields by Christi Jeane
No matter what industry we’re in, women benefit more in the long run from bringing our whole selves to work. Not the scaled down version that confines to “their” rules. We got into our industries for a reason by something deep within propelling us forward–NOT by how many people told us we couldn’t or shouldn’t because we may not fit in.
It took me nearly 10 years into my career to feel that I really belonged in it.
Anxiety Hangover by Christine Carpenter
A fellow writer whom I’ve been exchanging essays with, providing feedback back and forth, recently read one of my pieces about anxiety. She commented that while she knows that I’ve mentioned my struggles with anxiety, she noticed that in our weekly zooms for our writing workshop, I look so composed and so together. I found this interesting because I thought …well, I am sort of composed and together. And then it occurred to me that it has been years of conditioning in a non-accepting world that I have spent concealing my fears and anxieties.
Butterfly Wings by Megan McCoy Dellecese
Vulnerability is butterfly wings.
Not the wings of a newly-freed woman,
fresh to adulthood and blind to the dangers,
but of sunken-eyed parents who read
writing on walls, on news, on faces.
They’ve used their wings hard
in pandemic tornado winds and in icy frosted tones.
Deep fears have struck those delicate wings
with the challenge of raising good.
with love, eunice. by Eunice Brownlee
Dear Kevin,
You may never read this, although I’m hoping that you are able to. Your words from two weeks ago are still echoing in my head—”before we live with regrets”—and I have to tell you, honestly, I have no regrets when it comes to you.
Ours is a story of true love.
Not a romantic sort of love—that type that hits you hard and is filled with passion, yet fades away as the years pass.
No, ours is that slow burning kind of love. That knowing, fully vulnerable, deep from within the soul kind of love. The kind that has been there forever and will last long after we are both gone.
Write More. Write Better. Stay Inspired.
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